fucked my brains up

i think it realli is fucked up...
around 1am plus last night... turned off my com and went to bed... maybe it was the damn weather... just couldnt get to sleep no matter what...in most cases, i would fall asleep after rolling around for an hour... but i didn't...never ever had i had this kind of experience... was so surreal... was drifting in and out of sleep... was hyper sensitive to surroundings and at the same time was almost going paranoid... just remember telling myself to take my temperature... could be my brains getting fried from a fever... cld hear flushing noises... some male grunting voice... then my mum walked over and all... then the image of me screaming and running to my mum's room... then i smashed my finger into the wall with my knee (this was real coz i felt the pain and my finger is still sore)... could see like patterns on the ceiling spinning... could feel like shadows looming over me... it almost seemed like the moments someone felt before he spiralled into total insanity... hahaha...

then the "normal" dreams came... first was a dream about a luncheon at my uncle's place in bkt timah... we were eating... then could see wedding cars going to the neighbour's place... then there was a car accident and some guys were ran over... but no one bothered... then saw some boys running around the area where the accident occured... really strange... then the 2nd dream sequence was again with my family... but this time living in a rather japanese flat... in an area that looked like a mix between indonesia, NUS and chinatown on a slope... realli strange again... went shopping for a tv... when we already had 4 in the flat... then it was raining and all... and again... more food...

but like all dream sequences... by the time i woke up... i almost forgot everything... so here i am blogging down whatever i could remember... and it sort of frightened me... i never had so much problem sleeping... maaybe its time to go back to melatonin to regulate the sleep thing... yes tania i shall have it at a proper time to regulate my sleep pattern... not treat it like a sleeping pill...

ok here's wat happened the past few days...
1. been ill since saturday... bad cold... stuffed nose... phlegm and fever... the works...
2. missed church and danny's birthday... damn... was so lookin forward to those...
3. lazed arnd at home on sunday.. watched matrix revolution again... i cant believe those malaysians... they laugh at everything! its either they are stupid or have know idea what genre the show is...
4. felt a little better yesterday so i went to the airport in the evening to get khimmy... he came back from thailand... as usual... his flight was delayed so this sick thing was freezing his ass off in terminal one...
5. then we went to eat noodles at crystal jade at around 10... i had a bowl of hot and sour soup... and my nose totally cleared up... and started to flow again... haha... gluttony
6. came home around 11... ate more... then ref: pre-sleep saga above


*sigh* he'll be going off again... he asked me if i wld miss him...
i might. "P